When a toddler with autism isn’t talking yet, the instinct is often to redirect them — point to what you want them to look at, hold up a flashcard, ask them to repeat a word. It makes sense. But it usually backfires.
The strategy with the strongest research behind it works the opposite way: get down on the floor and join whatever the child is already doing.
Why It Works
A child has to want to share something with you before they’ll try to tell you about it. Researchers at UCLA built an approach called JASPER around exactly this idea — joining a child’s focus first, then building play and language on top of it — and controlled studies have shown it improves joint attention, play, and language in young autistic children. Connection comes before communication, not the other way around.
How to Use It
You don’t need a toy bin full of “target” activities. Use whatever already has the child’s attention.
- If they’re stacking blocks, sit down and stack blocks too — don’t hand them something else.
- If they’re staring at the ceiling fan, look at the fan with them and say, “Spinning fan!”
- Wait for a glance, a smile, or a sound before jumping in with words of your own.
- Resist the urge to test them (“What color is this?”). Just join in.
A Few Tips
- Get physically down to their level. Eye level matters more than most adults realize.
- Let them lead for a few minutes before introducing anything new. Rushing to “teach” too fast can shut the moment down.
- Comment, don’t command. “Car goes fast!” invites more than “Say car.”
- Small wins count. A glance toward you while playing is progress, even without a word.
For Students with IEPs or Speech Goals
Following a child’s lead is often already built into early intervention or speech goals under names like “joint attention” or “engagement.” Check in with the speech-language pathologist or early intervention team about which of the child’s favorite activities they’re currently using — using the same ones at home keeps the approach consistent across settings.
The Bottom Line
Before a toddler can tell you about their world, they need a reason to want to share it with you. Joining their focus — instead of redirecting it — is often the fastest way to open that door.
Based on research on JASPER (Joint Attention, Symbolic Play, Engagement, and Regulation), developed at UCLA, and follow-up studies showing lasting gains in joint attention and language for autistic children who received this type of early intervention.
